A [NationalityB] walked into a shopping centre and saw an attractive shop. He walked inside and said in a thick [NationalityB] accent: Can you gimme a half kilo of cheese please?
Everyone began to laugh loudly. As the [NationalityB] walked away deeply offended, he thought to himself: If I learn to speak good [LanguageA], then they will not know I am [NationalityB].
He took course after course until he spoke flawless [LanguageA].
He went back to [NationA] and went into a shop. There he said in his best [LanguageA]: May I have half a loaf of sliced brown bread, four biscuits and a white milk loaf?
The shopkeeper began to laugh uproariously and said: You're [NationalityB], right?
The poor [NationalityB] was completely embarrassed and said: But I spoke perfect [LanguageA]. I don't have the slightest [NationalityB] accent.
The shopkeeper replied: You asked for bread. This is a butcher shop.
Showing posts with label language. Show all posts
Showing posts with label language. Show all posts
Thursday, 19 November 2020
Generic language joke
Sunday, 9 May 2010
Spiraling out of control
Why is it that a debacle is usually described in the press as "spiraling out of control"? Given the chaotic nature of events one would think "lurching out of control" or "staggering out of control" might be more apt. Spiraling just sounds too orderly.
I surmise that one reason is that spiraling implies some kind of malevolent impelling force that keeps the object out of reach of the players, thus absolving them of any fault in causing the problem. The mental imagery is also more attractive: the object's trajectory is making people dizzy trying to track it.
Another reason is obvious to anybody who has seen a runaway firework that has been imparted circular momentum; it traces a corkscrew-like path. The images that come to me are from the closing scenes of Koyaanisqatsi where the camera tracks in slow motion the debris of an Atlas-Centaur rocket explosion. But then "corkscrewing out of control" sounds all wrong, and one might even suspect the protagonists of too much drinking. And of course the language mafia would come after you for inventing yet another verb from a noun.
I surmise that one reason is that spiraling implies some kind of malevolent impelling force that keeps the object out of reach of the players, thus absolving them of any fault in causing the problem. The mental imagery is also more attractive: the object's trajectory is making people dizzy trying to track it.
Another reason is obvious to anybody who has seen a runaway firework that has been imparted circular momentum; it traces a corkscrew-like path. The images that come to me are from the closing scenes of Koyaanisqatsi where the camera tracks in slow motion the debris of an Atlas-Centaur rocket explosion. But then "corkscrewing out of control" sounds all wrong, and one might even suspect the protagonists of too much drinking. And of course the language mafia would come after you for inventing yet another verb from a noun.
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